Co-creation night 3, part 2: comfort and safety

Nibhana is a place with lots of freedom. We do realize that when we take all sorts of freedom, it also impacts those around us. This is why we spent the second half of the third co-creation night, talking about how to feel comfortable and safe in a place like Nibhana. The results can be found below!

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Safety through agreements

Clear rules

It's important to set clear rules/guidelines, also so that people know they can move freely within these. Principles and guidelines/rules are possibly already agreed upon when buying the ticket online (tick box that must be ticked).

Agreed Symbols

There are clearly agreed (body) signals, symbols, codes or accessories with which people indicate their boundaries and mood/state.

Rule clarification during the opening

Start the week with an introduction of the principles and guidelines/rules (which include the way boundaries are indicated) and require everyone's explicit agreement. Possibly don't include physical intimicy in this opening; enable participants to get used to the space and people and to open up slowly.

Safety through the right terrain

Clearly defined areas

The purpose of spaces (types of activities, behaviors, emotions) and related rules are indicated and communicated clearly; quiet/calm versus loud/energetic spaces and activities. It is clear where nudity is allowed and where not. There are also open spaces without designated topic/activity. There is a private space to which people can withdraw and be alone/in quiet (that may not be entered by others). There are cozy and warm spaces with blankets, candles, et cetera. There could be a space where people can express hard emotions such as anger. There are dedicated smoking areas, inside and outside. There is an area for crying. There is an area for sex (sex tent). There is a spa area. There is a space to change clothes/costumes (dressing room). There could be a silent disco for those who want (different types of) music and regulate the volume themselves. Each area could have a welcome gate. Keep areas far enough apart from each other.

Safe sleeping areas

The sleeping area must feel safe and quiet and best be free of sexual activities.

Personal Hygiene

There is sufficient space for personal hygiene (bathrooms with showers). Even if a laundry room is available, the team could provide extra clothes, toothpaste, deodorant, and peppermint for participants to use for their good hygiene.

Tidy and Clean

Keep the space tidy and clean (also no physical obstacles or disturbances during activities and workshops). Everyone is generally responsible for this, not just dedicated staff! In additions, the team could assign participants to the clean-up task per day. Everyone could clean up the entire space together at end of the week. There need to be enough trash bins.

Climate

There is good climate control and air circulation for indoor spaces. There are carpets, blankets, pillows etc. where people sit on the (cold) floor.

Light

Ensure there is enough light everywhere, also outside, but adjust the amount of light to the purpose of the space/area.

Safe Sex

There are free condoms available and a safe sex policy is communicated.

Sharing Wall

Use a sharing wall/board on which people can share problems, wishes, and/or desires.

Number of people

Possibly limit the amount of participants wisely to match the available space.

Themes and target groups

Per week there could be a different main theme with matching activities, so to attract different types people.

Safety through the right team

Medic First Aid

There is professionally trained Medic First Aid staff.

Love Police

There are people whose job it is to keep everyone (emotionally and mentally) safe; they have the right to check on everyone and to remind others of rules or to enforce the following of rules where needed. There are dedicated people to overlook what is happening on the terrain and who can manage conflicts. They and the facilitators have skills and capacity to manage any sort of situation professionally. They could be named Love/Rainbow/Nibhana Police.

Light Workers

There are dedicated people to support, motivate and energize you (when needed), such as coaches or light workers.

Clear Timelines

The main facilitators, and/or people who give workshorps, clearly communicate when there are breaks in which participants can leave e.g. a workshop. Timelines are clear.

Social safety

Clear Intentions

All participants share their intentions for the week in the opening ceremony.

Group Moments

Have at least 1 moment with the whole group per day to invite conversations and connection amongst everyone; an option would be to start every day with a morning opening ceremony with everyone; also an option is to have this gathering during a meal.

Respect

A respectful and non-judgemental attitude is expected and enforced.

Inclusion

Everyone has an open attitude and aims to create an atmosphere of inclusion and trust; invite others (to your group or activity, out of their comfort zone).

Honesty

Everyone has the intention to be honest and to listen to others' feedback (openness to change); be direct in a empathetic/compassionate manner.

Personal Boundaries

People set clear boundaries for themselves and say "No" if they don't want something. Everyone takes responsibility for their own wellbeing; do not allow others to project their (negative) emotions onto you (without your consent).

Respect for others' boundaries

Respect other people's boundaries, especially when they use agreed signals/codes; listen to and interpret their signals even when these are not very explicit (use intuition, empathy, compassion). Everyone needs to be aware of the space they take.

Looking out for each other

Everybody pays attention to how everyone is doing and will address when things are not going right, when people don't behave according to the set norms, when rules are not adhered, when people are being treated badly by others - address the involved people or, if necessary, report to the facilitators or the 'love police'. But nobody forces their support/help on others without their consent.

Buddy System

Create and make use of a buddy system.

Respect for possessions

Show respect for others' possessions and don't take what is yours without asking.

Conscious Consumption

Conscious Consumption: People should not be allowed to wear/use strong perfumes or other scents.